A little confusion

So in my first post I stated how I knew I wasn't ready for kids. I did not mean to imply that I was prego. I am not. Just thought I might clear that up. But while I am on this subject, it seems that everyone I grew up with is getting married and/or having kids. There was a core group of girls that I played softball with from February to November for years and almost all of them are married. I am also a year older than this group of girls. I often wonder if I am running behind or if they are just ahead of the game. Some days I think they are crazy to get married and 20, 21, or 22. Other days I am jelous that they have "started their lives" and I am still living like a poor college student.

Matt and I have been dating for about a year and a half so the topic of marriage has come up on multiple occasions and we are both in agreement that we want to do it, just not now. After this school year he will probably move in with me since Travis has his eye's set on Dallas after graduation. We have talked about it and we both think it would be a responsible decision for us. We are both products of divorce so we want to avoid that at all costs. I firmly believe that you can love someone with all your heart but they might not be the right person for you.

He said yes when I proposed this living situation to him but then his next response was what I was thinking. What will our families think? I know that most of my family is opposed to "living in sin" by the things they said about my brother living with his girlfriend(s). He has done this on a few occasions. I am sure Matt's family will have similar views.

He has semi-conservative views while mine are fairly liberal. Our families however are both in the strongly-to-semi conservative category and this has to due with their strong ties to the church. I love that they have these ties because they wouldn't be the people they are with out God in their lives. I am the same way. God is in my life just as much as theirs, but I just interpret his teaching differently. I have been turned-off by every church I have ever attended except for this non-denominational church that my softball coach attended. This has probably helped spawn my "crazy" liberal views. Anyway, Matt and I are most likely going to live together before we get married and I am terrified of telling my family about it. I guess in some ways I still see my self as my mom and dad's little girl and I don't want to upset them.

Im not really sure what this post has turned in to and I am not sure what my point is. Oh well, I guess that's life. One more sad note, the Tampa Bay Rays killed my Red Sox again tonight 13-4. As long as we follow the patterns of our last two ALCS's, we should win the last three games...I hope. As long as Manny Rameriez, Joe Torre, and the Dodgers don't make it to the world series then I will be okay. GO SOX!!!